Signs of Expat depression? - Feeling like the 5th wheel on the wagon?

Your partners prestigious job promotion abroad was supposed to be the beginning of an exciting new chapter in your lives. However, since the move you’ve been feeling lost, empty, depressed, and anxious. You want to be supportive, but should that mean hiding just how much you are struggling?

You left your job, friends, family, language and culture, everything that was familiar to you. You have started to realise that the exciting chapter has lost its excitement. Language and cultural barriers have reduced your ability to form social connections, and you have began feeling like an outsider. Familiar?

Up to 84% of expat spouses are female, you might feel alone, but what you’re going through is quite common.

A move to everything unfamiliar can lead to:

· Lack of structure

· Lack of direction

· Loss of identity

· Financial dependence

· Feeling disconnected

· Lack of meaning

· Overall frustration

· Feeling out of control

…………………………………..You may even be questioning your self worth.

……………………………………Which in turn can lead to expat depression.

What is Expat Depression?

Expat depression isn’t that different from regular depression, except in what causes it. People with depression often feel hopeless, fatigued, and uninterested in things they used to enjoy. It doesn’t necessarily mean you feel sad. A lot of times, depression makes it hard to feel much of anything. When depression is mild, it might just feel like everything is grey, but you can still function, but more moderate or severe depression may look like:

· Having trouble getting out of bed, or doing everyday tasks like washing, getting dressed, and leaving the house

· Having trouble sleeping, or sleeping too much

· No appetite, or binge eating

· Overusing substances like alcohol or drugs

Here are some tips that may help:

Get enough sleep

Once you’ve adjusted to your local time-zone, try a sleep schedule that gets you 7-9 hours every night. Limiting screen time before bed, keeping your room dark and quiet, and using relaxation techniques can help you get more restful sleep.

Be aware of what you eat

While dealing with expat depression, it’s not uncommon to experience a change in appetite, this can be loss of appetite, or its opposite—binge eating or emotional eating (for more on emotional eating check out this article). Eating a more balanced diet, and getting enough nutrition, can help your body even out its emotional cycles. When in doubt, eat things that are as close to their natural state as possible.

Avoid Alcohol

The social pressures of drinking in the expat community are very real, especially when you are trying so hard to fit in and build your social circles. Alcohol can easily become an emotional gap filler a coping mechanism for depression, but it also makes its symptoms worse. Try and limit your alcoholic intake. Perhaps set yourself a goal, only drinking at social gatherings and then limiting yourself to 1-2 drinks.

Get Some Exercise

When you’re depressed, often the last thing you want to do is get on the treadmill, however, exercise is the most helpful activity for depression. You don’t have to do a full cardio work-out, a simple walk in nature can lift your mood and energy, or even something as simple as dancing along to your favourite song.

Have Some Fun

If you’re depressed, the idea that you could just “have fun” may seem impossible. Depression makes it hard to feel pleasure, so you don’t feel good and don’t even know what would feel good. But if you can manage to try something you used to enjoy, it can sometimes be a pick-me-up. Pick something low-stress: walk your dog, read a book, visit an art gallery.

Call a Friend

Those who are dealing with expat depression often find that it has to do with isolation and the loss of support from family and friends. Try and keep connected, its important you see a friendly supportive face. Perhaps plan in regular FaceTime or WhatsApp calls.

Limit Stress

Moving to a new country involves lots of elements to manage which brings with it stress. If you’re struggling, see if there are stressors you can reduce or eliminate for example, focus on making your house your home, hire someone to help with tasks, cleaning etc and importantly set some you time. Focussing on the right balance of, sleep, food, exercise, to help reduce the stress load on your body and mind can really help when feeling depressed.

Seek Professional Help

Finally, if any of this feels too overwhelming to handle on your own—and it’s okay if it does! Look into talking to a professional. Here at Pure Purpose™ we have years of dealing first hand with the challenges of living in the expat world and talking to someone who understands the issues can be the biggest help of all.